You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
17 year olds will be the death of me.
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
I think I found out what we're going be for Halloween....Alcohol poisoning victims.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
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