You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
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