But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
Randomize
