im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
Randomize
