She went from zero to smokin in five shots
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
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