I must be too annoying 4 u.
It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
his ringtone is the jonas brothers. get me the fuck out of here NOW.
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
Randomize
