Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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