Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
Have you seen our bachelor? He's MIA. Last seen being led to some hookers by Kanye look-a-like.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd like to preapologize if you or your mom see me naked at some point this weekend.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
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