I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
barely 48 hours and I've done the dirty on both of my roommates beds before they've even slept in them
I feel very compelled to cut off the person's ears that is sitting in front of me
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
Randomize
