just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
I sat down with you and helped you write your will last night. I was THAT convinced that you weren't waking up.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize
