Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
using my metrocard to split lines. it says optimism on the back. i am optimistic that you will appear at my door and help me finish all these drugs.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
So our annual Dick Trip has been tentatively scheduled for the week of July 1 - 5. This years theme is "Fucking for Freedom".
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
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