the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize
