I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
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