we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
If there was chocolate on Regis Philban's dick, I would totally lick it off. That's how desperate I am for some right now.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Randomize
