There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
Dude my date hates me, Im on a rooftop full of Turkish people, and Ricky Martin is blasting on the radio. I was wrong earlier when I said I have my shit together
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
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