We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
She said she couldn't sleep with a guy who had blood stains on his ceiling. I tried to explain it wasn't my blood, but she still left :(
Just had flashback to me showering u with stir fry as u rythed on the floor
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
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