To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Don't make out with my wife yet
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
My dad, when he got home and saw me loading a bowl in the living room: "We have TWO beautiful balconies to get high on and you pick the couch?!"
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize
