Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
Sitting in my car feasting on the spoils of Taco Bell as Donna Lewis croons "I love you, always forever." A more perfect moment will never exist.
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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