So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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