Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
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