People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
Still butthurt there's a framed picture of me passed out on the toilet in my grandparents' living room
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
So I'm pretty sure I told every one at the party that "I'm going to fuck my pillow pets tonight?"
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
HE'S FUCKING 19 YEARS OLD, HE CAN'T EVEN GET INTO A BAR WITH ME, WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'LL LET HIM IN MY PANTS?!
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