clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
