For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Randomize