I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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