trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
Sext me about skeletons
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
I think I just sharted jello shots
Randomize
