Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
There is a half eaten corn dog and soy sauce on the counter... WTF did you eat last night??
Holy shit bill nye is being consulted as an expert on cnn and hes credited as the science guy. What the fuck is the world coming to?
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
