Can Purell be used as lube?
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
So much Jack, so little girl.
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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