I think im going to throw up on grandma
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Pulled a muscle in my back masturbating. But still listed as probable.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Randomize
