dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
I'm gonna guess ur still high cus last night at like 3am my pillows were morphing into cats and I kept trying to pet them
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize