Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
The cereal milk was almost black, the bacon was still frozen and the toast was soggy. And that was BEFORE I puked in her lap.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
Randomize
