okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen