So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
We're playing Big Buck Hunter to determine who buys the next pitchers. And they said video games wouldn't help me later in life
i havent thrown up in four monthes, im clearly not drinking enough
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
Sometimes you gotta take mushrooms and swim on a rooftop pool to figure out your relationship
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
Randomize