I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
Randomize
