The bar is filled with bros right now. Sucks I had to pay $5 to find that out.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
Well if homeless lesbian experimenting divorcée is your new M.O., you're gonna need to start drinking more anyway so if that's what it takes to talk about it tomorrow afternoon, bottoms up bitch
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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