Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
I ended up sleeping with him in a public bathroom because neither of us remembered where we lived. I have hit a new low.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
Randomize
