I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize
