My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
I think I just shit out all my problems.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
