I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
I'm not drinking for the rest of the week. I need discipline, celery, dick, and a bible.
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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