North Korea, Best Korea!
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
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