And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
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IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
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She answered the door wearing a basket, said it was the only clean thing she had.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
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