A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
My secretary told me she wishes she can have an affair with someone in the office (she's separated from her cheating husband)...Umm...Okaaay
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Randomize
