Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
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The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
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At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
Another beautiful Sunday, another beautiful day the stick is not positive. Amen.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
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