i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
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