what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
Randomize
