we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
When my options for Friday night are being a 3rd wheel or bringing a gay man as my date i need to focus on other things in life like having a successful career.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
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