Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
wat bout pragnant strippers??
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
If you want to borrow my flask for all future interviews as a good luck charm because your last one went so well with it in your suit pocket, just let me know
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
Randomize