the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
Randomize
