we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
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