I got chris browned last night
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
I'm too stoned to come over for sex
Yes that is a Krispy Kreme doughnut on my cock
I'll be right over
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
last night I used snow as a chaser
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
Randomize
