Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
I just hope when I turn 21, it doesn't tank my entire semester.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
