Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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